I see it looking down on this scene.

I’m with my dad, and we’re leaving the house.  I’m about 10 years old. I’m going with him or maybe he’s going out.  I must have said something, telling him what to do. Giving him instructions.  He says sharply,

Don’t be such a fishwife.

His words cut me even though I don’t know what that means, but it’s not good.

I’m bossy Chrissy. I’m spoiling his fun.

I felt unsafe around my parents. Even my mom. I never relaxed. I had to be in control.  I want rules. I enforce them. I am the spoilsport.